Welcome to Avalon

[Section9]

Got a rules question for you guys: were you using actual Infinity rules for the TAG battles? Was thinking that TAGsoft would make an interesting change to the usual Infinity game, though I'm probably the only person in the group with enough TAGs to play it.

[Errhile]

Nope.

Kathara_Khan cooked up a narrative mechanic for the entire game (actually, combat games are the only thing it does cover), derived from WEGs d6.
Since we don't live in the same city anymore, the game sessions are ran over a voice chat. Setting up the table for a TAG battle wouldn't be practical thus...

[Kathara_Khan]

Not to mention, if we actually used Infinity for the matches, the Angels would win every time, because I suck at this game!
(one of the many reasons I gave up on it...)

But if you ever end up playing a TAG only game with the tabletop rules, do let us know how it went!

Hm, one of those days, I might just cook up a set of custom stat lines for the Angels, and maybe some opponents. Though they probably won't have point costs attached...

[Errhile]

Well, I guess someone on the forums would be more than happy to set the point costs for whatever you cook up

[Kathara_Khan]

True.

Though I kinda worry that the fine distinctions in their skill levels would actually fall beneath the resolution of the system.
That, and if they're statted realistically, they'll probably be rather frustrating and not much fun to play, what with most attributes in the civilian range (BS 6, etc.).
Like, Nyree and Octy may actually approach BS 10, but only them.
But maybe I should make all the Angels' BS one point higher than it should realistically be, to reflect their PanOceanian heritage...

[Section9]

Personally, I have long since moved on beyond hate for Serenity on that count (if I ever really hated it in the first place; like I said, I think it was fun on the whole). Nowadays, it just makes me sad.

“Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are these, 'It might have been.”

Serenity is OK as a movie by itself (I didn't see Firefly until after the movie came out). But killing Wash after the relief of "we landed in one piece" is just piss-poor storytelling, would have worked better to be hit before coming to a stop. And that's what pisses me off. That one of the better storytellers of the time slacked off. Wheadon knows it's bad storytelling and did it anyway. I'd understand if it was done off-screen like Book's death (needed to cut the movie down to time), or if the technology didn't exist to tell the story yet (like the Star Wars prequel movies). But just to make a quick jump-scare? please, even *I* write better than that, and I suck ass at creative writing.

======

No rules for TAGsoft, huh? I may need to mess around with what you've written about it so far (and raid my model collection).

[Kathara_Khan]

No rules for TAGsoft, huh? I may need to mess around with what you've written about it so far (and raid my model collection).

Well, there are rules. Quite extensive ones, a whole two pages worth! Just nothing that could be used with miniatures.

I deliberately moved away from anything that would require minis, or even a map of any kind.
As much as I'm normally not a fan of narrative mechanics at all (I rather greatly dislike all the narrative darlings of the present RPG world, like FATE, Cortex, or Gumshoe)? In this case this was the perfect way to make use of and emphasize the role of tactics, the Coaches' leadership, and the individual pilots' teamwork ability, which doesn't really work in the tabletop rules beyond the player's own skill.

But by all means, have at it if you want. Let us know what you'll come up with.

[Section9]

I think I'd need to dig out my old Rogue Trader book (or a points reverse-engineering) to allow for re-equipping TAGs. Blargh, I hate doing reverse engineering. Well, more the cross-checking of my results.

I think I'd want to add random event cards (like from Tomorrow's War) and probably a change-in-initiative mechanic that would swap which player was active first in a turn (like Tomorrow's War or Lord of the Rings SBG).

Would definitely need to add some variety of command and control mechanic, too. Maybe something like how an officer in Stargrunt can activate subordinate units instead of doing anything himself (This is a little different from being able to spend the Controller's order, it's more like being able to use the Controller's order to make 2 new orders)

=====
So, how goes the efforts into convincing the network to fund season 2?

[Kathara_Khan]

As far as equipping TAGs goes, I should probably explain, 'cause I've confused the issue a bit, I think.

When the story talks about TAGs wielding Combi Rifles, Boarding Shotguns, Pistols, SMGs, etc? What I mean are TAG-sized versions of those! (usually, unless otherwise noted) Since we're dealing with pure TAG on TAG combat, I went with describing the weapons by tactical role, rather than wargame mechanics.

Plus, I always found it absurd that the weapons the TAGs use, often portrayed on the minis as rivaling an unarmored Light Infantry trooper in size, translate into the exact same weapons, stat wise, that said trooper wields, which are tiny in comparison. If the infantry HMG and the TAG HMG are the same HMG, then either are the infantry somehow swinging around something like a 50 cal. autocannon, or the TAG is using what is at best a 7.62 SAW in a ridiculously over-sized frame. Both options seem equally stupid to me...

Since I'm not constrained with wargame mechanics anymore, I'm taking liberties with both nomenclature, and the setting itself. Errhile doesn't much care for this, as he feels it creates confusion with the wargame, and for people who read this only knowing the official books. And he's probably quite right. But since I don't particularly care about the wargame anymore, and value my own convenience somewhat above yours ( ) I stuck with this bit of "realism", as I perceive it.

If you want more wargame accurate stats for the weapons in the story, you have to kinda shift everything up at least a category. So a TAG rifle would be an HMG in wargame parlance. A TAG SMG would be a Spitfire. A TAG pistol would be a heavy pistol. A TAG boarding shotgun is a heavy shotgun. A TAG assault pistol is a combi rifle. More trouble arises where the wargame does not have a bigger alternative for a given weapon. What is a TAG-sized Spitfire? I went with a MULTI HMG in this case, justifying it in fluff with performance improvements that mostly fall below the wargame's resolution. For a TAG sniper rifle we're using a wargame autocannon. But what is a TAG heavy shotgun, grenade, or chain rifle? For the RPG I just made them up, and you'll have to either follow suit, or ignore those.

Also remember, that many of the TAGs featured in the story are made-up outdated machines, with no stats in the wargame! The Lizards, Anacondas, Geckos, etc. that the Angels use, are not the ones in the books, but older models, without the upgrades the Nomads put them trough to perform almost in line with the newest PanO machines, like Dragoes or Cutters. Their stats should be lower.

All of the above is of course important only if you actually want to simulate TAG-Soft more or less as presented in the series. If you just want a pure TAG game of Infinity tabletop loosely inspired by our idea, than you can probably safely ignore all of it.

====
As to season 2? I'm taking my between seasons hiatus break right now.
But ideas for the next episode are brewing. Still, hard to say right now when exactly you could expect to see it. May be as long as after New Year, alas.

[Section9]

As far as equipping TAGs goes, I should probably explain, 'cause I've confused the issue a bit, I think.

When the story talks about TAGs wielding Combi Rifles, Boarding Shotguns, Pistols, SMGs, etc? What I mean are TAG-sized versions of those! (usually, unless otherwise noted) Since we're dealing with pure TAG on TAG combat, I went with describing the weapons by tactical role, rather than wargame mechanics.

But you're still talking about the ability to change weaponry between games.

Plus, I always found it absurd that the weapons the TAGs use, often portrayed on the minis as rivaling an unarmored Light Infantry trooper in size, translate into the exact same weapons, stat wise, that said trooper wields, which are tiny in comparison. If the infantry HMG and the TAG HMG are the same HMG, then either are the infantry somehow swinging around something like a 50 cal. autocannon, or the TAG is using what is at best a 7.62 SAW in a ridiculously over-sized frame. Both options seem equally stupid to me...

I assumed that TAGs usually carry bigger guns than what we see in Infinity, they just get down-gunned for special ops missions.

If you want more wargame accurate stats for the weapons in the story, you have to kinda shift everything up at least a category. So a TAG rifle would be an HMG in wargame parlance. A TAG SMG would be a Spitfire. A TAG pistol would be a heavy pistol. A TAG boarding shotgun is a heavy shotgun. A TAG assault pistol is a combi rifle. More trouble arises where the wargame does not have a bigger alternative for a given weapon. What is a TAG-sized Spitfire? I went with a MULTI HMG in this case, justifying it in fluff with performance improvements that mostly fall below the wargame's resolution. For a TAG sniper rifle we're using a wargame autocannon. But what is a TAG heavy shotgun, grenade, or chain rifle? For the RPG I just made them up, and you'll have to either follow suit, or ignore those.

Oh, I was planning on seeing if any of the guys had the Apocalypse Spray template from GW for the Chain Cannon... I figure a TAG-sized heavy shotgun would probably use the Large Teardrop and likely be DA ammo to boot (and AP+DA for the solid shot).

Also remember, that many of the TAGs featured in the story are made-up outdated machines, with no stats in the wargame! The Lizards, Anacondas, Geckos, etc. that the Angels use, are not the ones in the books, but older models, without the upgrades the Nomads put them trough to perform almost in line with the newest PanO machines, like Dragoes or Cutters. Their stats should be lower.

Yeah, I was planning on starting with Scarface's Ramhorn and mod from there.

As to season 2? I'm taking my between seasons hiatus break right now.
But ideas for the next episode are brewing. Still, hard to say right now when exactly you could expect to see it. May be as long as after New Year, alas.

Take the time you need to recharge, I'd much rather you have the energy to keep the story up to your current level than half-ass something just to make some arbitrary deadline.

[Kathara_Khan]

But you're still talking about the ability to change weaponry between games.

True. Though I imagine it doesn't happen all too often. Usually each pilot finds a weapon they're good with and that fits a role the team needs, and sticks with that, unless the team can't afford a weapon they want at first.

I assumed that TAGs usually carry bigger guns than what we see in Infinity, they just get down-gunned for special ops missions.

See, that's a possibility I hadn't thought about!
Though, I'm not sure why you'd want to down-gun yourself if the intel tells you there's a possibility of meeting another TAG...

Oh, I was planning on seeing if any of the guys had the Apocalypse Spray template from GW for the Chain Cannon... I figure a TAG-sized heavy shotgun would probably use the Large Teardrop and likely be DA ammo to boot (and AP+DA for the solid shot).

That sounds about right.

Yeah, I was planning on starting with Scarface's Ramhorn and mod from there.

A reasonable starting point. In the stats we're using, a pre-Praxis refit Lizard is even worse than a factory-new Ramhorn, but I'm using a scale with a bit more resolution, not to mention measuring different stats, than the wargame mechanics. The scale goes about pre-Nomad Lizard - Ramhorn - Guijia - Squalo, with more specialized models having particular stats all over the place.
Obviously, I'm taking some liberties again, to make things more varied and interesting. Like a Shalamandra being described as a heavy support unit, stronger and with more armor, but somewhat less mobile than a Lizard, with which it shares identical stats in the wargame, or a Maghariba, with it's unique six-legged drive, having it's mobility emphasized.
Not to mention the TAGs that I outright made-up for the story, like the Tachikoma/Wolf Spider, or the Ariadnan Roughneck series (we haven't seen that one yet; bonus points if you recognize the reference ).

Take the time you need to recharge, I'd much rather you have the energy to keep the story up to your current level than half-ass something just to make some arbitrary deadline.

I would be very disappointed myself, if I had to loose quality in exchange for getting it out at all...

[Errhile]

If you want more wargame accurate stats for the weapons in the story, you have to kinda shift everything up at least a category. So a TAG rifle would be an HMG in wargame parlance. A TAG SMG would be a Spitfire. A TAG pistol would be a heavy pistol. A TAG boarding shotgun is a heavy shotgun. A TAG assault pistol is a combi rifle. More trouble arises where the wargame does not have a bigger alternative for a given weapon. What is a TAG-sized Spitfire? I went with a MULTI HMG in this case, justifying it in fluff with performance improvements that mostly fall below the wargame's resolution. For a TAG sniper rifle we're using a wargame autocannon. But what is a TAG heavy shotgun, grenade, or chain rifle? For the RPG I just made them up, and you'll have to either follow suit, or ignore those.

Oh, I was planning on seeing if any of the guys had the Apocalypse Spray template from GW for the Chain Cannon... I figure a TAG-sized heavy shotgun would probably use the Large Teardrop and likely be DA ammo to boot (and AP+DA for the solid shot).

Well, remember it was all re-scaled between what ought to be RL and Infinity the game and then TAGSoft reality of Avalon Chronicles.

In tabletop terms, I'd represent the Chain Cannon Array as using a standard Large Template, upgraded Damage (14? 15?), upgraded Burst (say, B 2) and special ammo, namely AP. Perhaps even AP+Shock.
This would IMO aptly represent a Chain-type weapon capable of disabling a TAG... and being able to turn infantrymen into mincemeat by the scores...

[Kathara_Khan]

In tabletop terms, I'd represent the Chain Cannon Array as using a standard Large Template, upgraded Damage (14? 15?), upgraded Burst (say, B 2) and special ammo, namely AP. Perhaps even AP+Shock.
This would IMO aptly represent a Chain-type weapon capable of disabling a TAG... and being able to turn infantrymen into mincemeat by the scores...

By the way they describe a chain rifle working (basically a semi-auto blunderbuss, probably Gauss-propelled), I have some doubts if you could make it AP (it doesn't fire pre-arranged loads of shot that you could maybe replace with AP flachettes like in a shotgun, rather it seems to grind out it's own shrapnel from a spool of continuous chain - a bit ridiculous, really). For a more powerful, TAG-shredding version, especially if you'd like to keep the same template, I'd go for DA. Shock optional.

[Errhile]

Oh, you can achieve an armor-piercing effect in quite a few ways. And if we exclude shaped-charge explosive projectiles, we're left primarily with kinetic energy-based methods.
In short, if you throw a grain of sand at something fast enough, it will be deadly. Two aspects of a projectile affect its kinetic effect - mass and velocity.

I've envisioned the chain cannon throwing bigger chunks of metal than man-portable versions. Way bigger. Not the size and weight of - roughly - shotgun pellets the chain rifle uses, but ones that have mass and velocity of autocannon rounds. And the weapon throws them out in bucketload quantities each time the trigger is pulled.

Of course, this requires ammo sotrage big enough to store several bucketloads-worth of chainlink, and propelling such a mass of metal at such speed not only requires huge energy, but also generates huge recoil. That's why no-one considers this man-porstable - but it works as TAG-portable asset...

[Kathara_Khan]

I was always under the impression that, as you increase the velocity, you would actually make a projectile more and more "DA", and then even "EXP", unless it's very properly shaped to become "AP" instead, and even then once you pass a certain threshold of energy.
A bullet with more energy will, on average, defeat more armor, sure, but that alone doesn't make it AP as it's usually handled in games. For that it needs certain other properties beside pure energy, that also affect how it acts once past the armor. If all it does is use brute force, I'd consider that DA, or simply higher DMG.
Your hyper-fast grain of sand will be all kinds of deadly, sure, but I think realistically it wouldn't be an "AP" kind of deadliness, but more of an "EXP" one. Well, completely realistically, if it were so hyper-fast, it would most probably explode from air friction immediately upon exiting the barrel, but we usually ignore that - not much fun.

Since a chain weapon is not using pre-prepared loads, but mills its "buckshot" pretty randomly on the spot, you'll find it hard to reliably get the right shapes to make it AP. Unless the ammo chain is pre-stressed or something, or the milling mechanism very precise, but wouldn't that kinda defeat the purpose, which I gathered was for the weapon to be as cheap as possible?
Though, once we're into TAG-issue guns, "inexpensive" probably flies out the window anyway...

And we could always ignore the canonical explanation for how it works anyway, since it is kind of absurd, at least as I understand it. Storing the ammo as a continuous chain, and having to grind it to pieces internally before firing sounds like a lot of effort and complication that should really be handled at the ammo production stage instead of dumped into the weapon itself. But then it wouldn't really be different from a wide-choke, shot-only shotgun, which isn't very cool... Maybe say each load operates more like a Claymore mine than a shotgun shell?...

But all that aside, having the cannon be the chain version of the HRMC is an appealing thought...

[Section9]

But you're still talking about the ability to change weaponry between games.

True. Though I imagine it doesn't happen all too often. Usually each pilot finds a weapon they're good with and that fits a role the team needs, and sticks with that, unless the team can't afford a weapon they want at first.

Sure, but I need to re-point the TAGs that are packing different weapons than their stock fit, regardless.

I assumed that TAGs usually carry bigger guns than what we see in Infinity, they just get down-gunned for special ops missions.

See, that's a possibility I hadn't thought about!
Though, I'm not sure why you'd want to down-gun yourself if the intel tells you there's a possibility of meeting another TAG...

Much easier to deny that a military unit was there when the only evidence left behind is civilian-available ammo calibers.

And the AP or EXP rounds from the MultiHMG are acceptable for putting down a TAG, if not optimal. Infantry-packed AP+EXP is barely capable of one-shotting a TAG, the military likes going for the overkill. So twin missile launchers at a minimum (or more likely, "tandem charge ML" which does 6x wounds per successful hit).

Actually, I think that a MultiHMG is the TAG's secondary weapon, they usually carry something on par with a 25+mm chaingun like that the Bradley carries with the MultiHMG as the "co-axial" (to use a modern military/tanker term). My version of a TAG in open-warfare scenarios would be packing a 50mm cannon (or bigger) as the primary weapon, to have something big enough to deal with bunkers and other battlefield obstacles.

Not to mention the TAGs that I outright made-up for the story, like the Tachikoma/Wolf Spider,

I have several models for that one. There's a 1/72 scale Jigabachi ADV helo model that comes with 3 matching-scale Tachikomas (and I have 3 of those kits to make 6x Tachikomas and 2x Logikomas, need to finish the Logikoma conversions) Plus there's the PVC models you could get for a while that are closer to the size of a Mag Guard.

or the Ariadnan Roughneck series (we haven't seen that one yet; bonus points if you recognize the reference ).

Who do you think you're talking to? I have almost all the Roughneck Chronicles CGI animations (might have all of them). Is it the chicken-legged version,


the Ape suit version,


or the bigass Marauder from SST3 the movie?

[Kathara_Khan]

Sure, but I need to re-point the TAGs that are packing different weapons than their stock fit, regardless.

True that.

Much easier to deny that a military unit was there when the only evidence left behind is civilian-available ammo calibers.

When you put it this way, yeah, I can definitely see that.

And the AP or EXP rounds from the MultiHMG are acceptable for putting down a TAG, if not optimal. Infantry-packed AP+EXP is barely capable of one-shotting a TAG, the military likes going for the overkill. So twin missile launchers at a minimum (or more likely, "tandem charge ML" which does 6x wounds per successful hit).

Actually, I think that a MultiHMG is the TAG's secondary weapon, they usually carry something on par with a 25+mm chaingun like that the Bradley carries with the MultiHMG as the "co-axial" (to use a modern military/tanker term). My version of a TAG in open-warfare scenarios would be packing a 50mm cannon (or bigger) as the primary weapon, to have something big enough to deal with bunkers and other battlefield obstacles.

Yeah, now we're talking! That sounds more like what I'd expect in open TAG warfare, absolutely.

I have several models for that one. There's a 1/72 scale Jigabachi ADV helo model that comes with 3 matching-scale Tachikomas (and I have 3 of those kits to make 6x Tachikomas and 2x Logikomas, need to finish the Logikoma conversions) Plus there's the PVC models you could get for a while that are closer to the size of a Mag Guard.

Nice! You'll still need to make up stats for those, which was more what I meant.

Who do you think you're talking to? I have almost all the Roughneck Chronicles CGI animations (might have all of them).

Watch out everyone, we've got a badass over here!

(snip cool photos)

That is very cool!
And yeah, the Ape or Marauder is about what I imagine they'd look like, more or less. Re-sized for TAG scale of course.

[Section9]

Oh, I'm running the small Tachikomas as REMs. Simple counts-as, one TR HMG with a gatling gun under the chin, one SML with the howitzer unblocked, two combirifle/FO/Sensor bots, and I'd planned on two Repeaterbots (till someone pointed out that Yu Jing doesn't get AVA2 repeaterbots anymore). I'm using the bigger Fuchikoma bots that I sourced from a PVC figure set as my combat REMs, and I'm converting 2 more of the small Tachikomas into a pair of Logikomas from Arise to use as my baggagebots. Pics when they get closer to finished.

Back to the Chain Cannon thing, I probably would need to make them Burst 2, just to make them deadly enough to TAGs...

[Kathara_Khan]

For standard Infinity, sure. I meant more for emulating the story and TAG-Soft. I statted them basically as Geckos, but with better mobility, just like the Maghariba, and possible Climbing Plus, but somewhat lighter armament.

The chain cannon, I'd probably lean more towards it being B1 but outright EXP. It has a chance of taking a TAG out in one shot, but isn't all that reliable for it. Certainly less than a Panzerfaust. Mordred was terrifying because he hauled two of them, for B2. Plus the Angels' TAGs aren't yet as armored up as the refitted versions of the machines, so they feared the cannons more.
Either way, It'll turn a group of light infantry into a hamburger quarry...

[jherazob]

Okay, I've been barely touching the Internet for a week or so (so much to catch up with! ), and I come back here to the seeds of an actual miniatures TAGSoft game? I'm geeking out here

I guess I'll have to get Tags apart from my darling babe the Marut

[Kathara_Khan]

Okay, I've been barely touching the Internet for a week or so (so much to catch up with! ), and I come back here to the seeds of an actual miniatures TAGSoft game? I'm geeking out here

I guess I'll have to get Tags apart from my darling babe the Marut

Had to amuse ourselves somehow while you were gone.

Well, the Marut is not league legal for TAG-Soft, sadly. So you need something different.

[Errhile]

Okay, I've been barely touching the Internet for a week or so (so much to catch up with! ), and I come back here to the seeds of an actual miniatures TAGSoft game? I'm geeking out here

I guess I'll have to get Tags apart from my darling babe the Marut

Had to amuse ourselves somehow while you were gone.

Well, the Marut is not league legal for TAG-Soft, sadly. So you need something different.

A deep-modified Ramhorn, I'd guess. Made to look very Marut-like.

[Kathara_Khan]

Well, the Marut is not league legal for TAG-Soft, sadly. So you need something different.

A deep-modified Ramhorn, I'd guess. Made to look very Marut-like.

I'm thinking both the ALEPH teams get their TAGs completely custom built for them. There may be some late-model Ramhorn in the ancestry, if it's the last non-remote TAG the PanO corporations made (on which we don't really have info), but otherwise those machines are all cutting edge tech. Well, as cutting edge as it gets without outright rotfl-stomping the opposition, 'casue that makes for poor sport.

Anyway, having to accommodate a pilot, they're substantially larger, for sure. The Marut is a really compact, dainty machine, even for a RP TAG... (For a miniature conversion, your best starting place would actually be a O-Yoroi, I think, for the slim look.)
Plus you loose the four arms functionality. Though those don't do anything in the game anyway.
But you can totally keep the Miku-ponytails!

[Section9]

Okay, I've been barely touching the Internet for a week or so (so much to catch up with! ), and I come back here to the seeds of an actual miniatures TAGSoft game? I'm geeking out here

I guess I'll have to get Tags apart from my darling babe the Marut

Had to amuse ourselves somehow while you were gone.

And besides, I'm one of those sick people who is trying to own one of every TAG CB has ever made, to make a trade show game table (complete with booth babes next to the TAGs).

So of course I'm looking for ideas to field whole squads of TAGs!

[Kathara_Khan]

make a trade show game table (complete with booth babes next to the TAGs).

That sounds pretty awesome! And if you'd make at least a few of said booth babes beef- instead of cheese-cake, you've sold me completely on the idea.

[Claudius Sol]

Haven't been as up-to-date as I'd have liked, but I'm all caught up now and would like to thank y'all for such an entertaining read. Fingers crossed for a continuation.

[Kathara_Khan]

Haven't been as up-to-date as I'd have liked, but I'm all caught up now and would like to thank y'all for such an entertaining read. Fingers crossed for a continuation.

Thank you for staying with us for the ride!

A little bonus something for you all again, as I realized we have yet to show you the official colors of the Anjos de Rocha!
So here we are, as graciously presented for us on her pilot suit by the lovely miss Lai:
(no head gear again, as I still can't make it look good enough)

(Click here for the gallery)

[Section9]

make a trade show game table (complete with booth babes next to the TAGs).

That sounds pretty awesome! And if you'd make at least a few of said booth babes beef- instead of cheese-cake, you've sold me completely on the idea.

Cheesecake minis are easier to find than beefcake, so if you have a preference for a beefcake mini or two, I will add them to the collection.

[Kathara_Khan]

Cheesecake minis are easier to find than beefcake, so if you have a preference for a beefcake mini or two, I will add them to the collection.

Yeah, that's a serious problem with the idea. I can't really recall any really good ones.
I'm fond of Kudoi from Anima Tactics, he'd be great for the Nomad delegation, but with the death of the game he's OOP, so probably hard to obtain, plus I'm afraid his pose would make him hard to work with...
There should be a couple or so in the Hasslefree catalog?
And that's about all I can think of, sadly.

[Section9]

Kudoi?

This guy?

Pretty sure I have him.

What about Dark Cheshire? He looks like he should be on the cover of a Harlequin romance paperback...


And I'm looking at him right now, so I know I can put that model on the table!